The 6 Month Bout
The 6 Month Bout of Drama has hit, though I never would have known it would be coming from people I considered friends. Since we all share the same friendships I'm not going to let one person bash or talk bad about me for all to see without seeing both sides.
On Wednesday the 30th I was told that my link was no longer active on Thumblina's blog. The only reason it was "looked" for is because this person uses her blog as the "portal" to all of the friends blogs. Shocked I became because nothing was going on, we are friends, hmmm, maybe she's working on her blog, etc...
Then I see the "friends" post, which was more of a slap in the face and very intentional. Why did it shock me? Because I had just seen Thumblina at Princess' party on the 12th. I had talked with her via phone several times after that following weekend. There had been a week period, perhaps that I hadn't had a chance to really talk with her. But that's okay (I thought) because do friends have to stay in touch daily? I certainly didn't think anything of it. The holiday was coming up, I spent two days grocery shopping, printing out my recipes and cooking. Thanksgiving arrived along with our company (btw, Thumblina and her family were invited to join us as well but declined), then we had Sugar and Spice stay over. I had been invited by PurpleMama and Cubanita to the Convention but didnt really think I was going but since we had Sugar and Spice I decided to go back to Jax. Cubanita graciously offered a place for us to crash. We had dinner with Di and Tileman, Cuba and all of the kids and did some shopping. Saturday the kids and I went to the Convention with PurpleMama and Cubanita. I got home late Saturday evening. Sunday I spent time with Husker and cleaning my house. Monday was Christmas Shopping and that took most of the day.
Then comes Tuesday. I had seen a few days before on Thumblina's blog that she had been sick :( I felt so bad that I didn't know she was sick. I quicly posted get well wishes (as are still seen on her blog). I had actually posted replies quite a few times. That day I also sent her an email:
----- Original Message -----
From: xxxxxx
To: xxxxxxx
Sent: Tuesday, November 29, 2005 8:14 PM
Subject: Hi
Hey you how have you been?
I know you were sick last week :( feeling better?
How was your Thanksgiving?
xxx
Now we're back to her post about "friends" and her blogroll come Wednesday. How did I fit into her catagory of not being a friend to her? Only one week had lapsed between our conversations. This hurt me because I was a friend to her but friendships are NOT one sided. Yet, how do I get the brunt of it all? I'm the easy target. Obviously, IMO, Thumblina is not happy and therefore Java gets the kicks.
I forward my email back to her on Wednesday after her post:
----- Original Message -----
From: xxxxx
To: xxxxx
Sent: Wednesday, November 30, 2005 3:39 PM
Subject: Fw: Hi
I guess this email means nothing....
What's up with your blog?
xxxx called to ask if we were on the "outs"... nice way of finding out shit like that.
I've been really busy lately and last week was a holiday week, I guess I just don't understand your moods! You know the phone/email/IM works both ways!
From Thumblina:
So, there you have it. This is IMO so childish that I can't even comprehend it. I can't reply or respond to it any longer. I have to focus on me, my health, my pregnancy, my kids, my husband and the people who are mature enough to know that if a week goes by without any communication that hey, I do still love you and care about you and I think about you often.
Don't measure your friendships based on how many phone calls you get, how many emails you receive or by IMs. Everyone has lives to live, sometimes one may be busier than others. I'm really saddened by this but she wants it to be "let go" so therefore I'm letting it go.
And BTW... many of us have site meters that show how much traffic comes to your blog, location etc.. Those site stats are sent via email so there is no need for me to "monitor" my blog stats and IPs daily but if I did, that's my business.
So friends, I apologize if you have been brought into the middle. I appreciate the support and encouragement to just keep going becase honestly there is nothing I can do on my end.
On Wednesday the 30th I was told that my link was no longer active on Thumblina's blog. The only reason it was "looked" for is because this person uses her blog as the "portal" to all of the friends blogs. Shocked I became because nothing was going on, we are friends, hmmm, maybe she's working on her blog, etc...
Then I see the "friends" post, which was more of a slap in the face and very intentional. Why did it shock me? Because I had just seen Thumblina at Princess' party on the 12th. I had talked with her via phone several times after that following weekend. There had been a week period, perhaps that I hadn't had a chance to really talk with her. But that's okay (I thought) because do friends have to stay in touch daily? I certainly didn't think anything of it. The holiday was coming up, I spent two days grocery shopping, printing out my recipes and cooking. Thanksgiving arrived along with our company (btw, Thumblina and her family were invited to join us as well but declined), then we had Sugar and Spice stay over. I had been invited by PurpleMama and Cubanita to the Convention but didnt really think I was going but since we had Sugar and Spice I decided to go back to Jax. Cubanita graciously offered a place for us to crash. We had dinner with Di and Tileman, Cuba and all of the kids and did some shopping. Saturday the kids and I went to the Convention with PurpleMama and Cubanita. I got home late Saturday evening. Sunday I spent time with Husker and cleaning my house. Monday was Christmas Shopping and that took most of the day.
Then comes Tuesday. I had seen a few days before on Thumblina's blog that she had been sick :( I felt so bad that I didn't know she was sick. I quicly posted get well wishes (as are still seen on her blog). I had actually posted replies quite a few times. That day I also sent her an email:
----- Original Message -----
From: xxxxxx
To: xxxxxxx
Sent: Tuesday, November 29, 2005 8:14 PM
Subject: Hi
Hey you how have you been?
I know you were sick last week :( feeling better?
How was your Thanksgiving?
xxx
Now we're back to her post about "friends" and her blogroll come Wednesday. How did I fit into her catagory of not being a friend to her? Only one week had lapsed between our conversations. This hurt me because I was a friend to her but friendships are NOT one sided. Yet, how do I get the brunt of it all? I'm the easy target. Obviously, IMO, Thumblina is not happy and therefore Java gets the kicks.
I forward my email back to her on Wednesday after her post:
----- Original Message -----
From: xxxxx
To: xxxxx
Sent: Wednesday, November 30, 2005 3:39 PM
Subject: Fw: Hi
I guess this email means nothing....
What's up with your blog?
xxxx called to ask if we were on the "outs"... nice way of finding out shit like that.
I've been really busy lately and last week was a holiday week, I guess I just don't understand your moods! You know the phone/email/IM works both ways!
From Thumblina:
I haven't received any emails from you recently. And I stated in my blog that I haven't picked up the phone or sent out emails to anyone. I thanked the people that keep in touch with me since I am so lousy at calling people and emailing them. I already understand that you are too busy for me. That's fine. My place has already been filled in your life anyways
So, there you have it. This is IMO so childish that I can't even comprehend it. I can't reply or respond to it any longer. I have to focus on me, my health, my pregnancy, my kids, my husband and the people who are mature enough to know that if a week goes by without any communication that hey, I do still love you and care about you and I think about you often.
Don't measure your friendships based on how many phone calls you get, how many emails you receive or by IMs. Everyone has lives to live, sometimes one may be busier than others. I'm really saddened by this but she wants it to be "let go" so therefore I'm letting it go.
And BTW... many of us have site meters that show how much traffic comes to your blog, location etc.. Those site stats are sent via email so there is no need for me to "monitor" my blog stats and IPs daily but if I did, that's my business.
So friends, I apologize if you have been brought into the middle. I appreciate the support and encouragement to just keep going becase honestly there is nothing I can do on my end.
posted by Mary at 1:59 PM
3 Comments:
I understand how you feel! I saw Thumblina at the Halloween Party, smiled from across the room and kept on doing what I was doing. I was busy! Did she stop and say "hi" to me? No! So why is it all my fault for not stopping and saying hi to her? It's not like I avoided eye contact or anything (like she did to me at Elisabeth's Birthday Party), but oh well. If someone's gonna overreact about something like that and get mad because you don't make enough effort when they make none at all...I don't need them in my life. And as far as the "I've already been replaced in your life", I'm sure you have enough room for more than one friend! I sure hope so, anyway! LOL Women are so catty, why can't we all just get along? ;)
Thanks Blue... I'm sorry that you have been put into the same category. As well as Jaws, her link was removed...hello, she has been in the hospital having a baby and well, who wants to be on the computer 24/7 when you're about to give birth? Just sad! I'm sorry!!!
She's obviously going thru some issues with herself to feel that she has been "replaced" by people that we were/are both friends with. It is really silly.
She should have just came back to the playgroup instead of feeling lonely at home! :(
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