Night of Hell!
I had the worst night by far, in a very long time! I put the kids to bed with a movie around 11-11:30 {Okay so 10:30 isn't working out so great, but hey, I'll settle with 11!}. They didn't want to go to sleep, I think it was well after midnight until they finally dozed off.
I finished chatting with some friends. I got into an argument with one, which makes me very sad to even think about. I'm so disappointed. But hey, to each his own. I made a deal with myself that I will NOT get upset anymore with regards to what other people choose to do with their lives. Easier said than done, huh?
I was upset. I laid in bed thinking about everything. Thinking about the one person that really could make it all better. He's not here. Why? I really don't know why my dad had to leave this earth so early. He was the one single person I could count on NO MATTER what. I swear he was a genius. He had an answer for everything. Such a compasionate man, yet sometimes overly emotional (he would almost be considered 'Metro' these days!). I miss my dad. Since he passed my family has gone to shit. My kids really only have Husker and I. My mom has her own life. Want to know why she couldn't make it to my shower?!?!?? She had a "girls day", when I called her to tell her about it, she couldn't talk because she was in a Porn Store. She hasn't called me back yet. And won't. Husker's family isn't any better. They never call. The kids only know 'of' them during the Holidays when they send gifts. They've NEVER been out of Nebraska and never will.
So, I sob for hours over everything. I haven't had a good cry in a long time. One of those very heartfelt-hole in your heart-empty-gut wrenching-cries. I got up and got a Pepcid. I needed it after all of that! I watched countless numbers of infomercials. Had a snack. Before I knew it, it was 4am. I laid back down. RLS hit, so I couldn't get comfortable, my legs ached. I ran a hot bath and soaked for a while. By 5am I was wide awake again. Went back to the couch and scrolled through the channels. TV sucks that early. All the sudden it's 7:15 and Husker is home from work. By 7:30 I snuggled with him in bed and was sound asleep. I guess that's all I needed.
Husker let me sleep peacefully till after 1pm this afternoon. It's been an odd day thus far.
I finished chatting with some friends. I got into an argument with one, which makes me very sad to even think about. I'm so disappointed. But hey, to each his own. I made a deal with myself that I will NOT get upset anymore with regards to what other people choose to do with their lives. Easier said than done, huh?
I was upset. I laid in bed thinking about everything. Thinking about the one person that really could make it all better. He's not here. Why? I really don't know why my dad had to leave this earth so early. He was the one single person I could count on NO MATTER what. I swear he was a genius. He had an answer for everything. Such a compasionate man, yet sometimes overly emotional (he would almost be considered 'Metro' these days!). I miss my dad. Since he passed my family has gone to shit. My kids really only have Husker and I. My mom has her own life. Want to know why she couldn't make it to my shower?!?!?? She had a "girls day", when I called her to tell her about it, she couldn't talk because she was in a Porn Store. She hasn't called me back yet. And won't. Husker's family isn't any better. They never call. The kids only know 'of' them during the Holidays when they send gifts. They've NEVER been out of Nebraska and never will.
So, I sob for hours over everything. I haven't had a good cry in a long time. One of those very heartfelt-hole in your heart-empty-gut wrenching-cries. I got up and got a Pepcid. I needed it after all of that! I watched countless numbers of infomercials. Had a snack. Before I knew it, it was 4am. I laid back down. RLS hit, so I couldn't get comfortable, my legs ached. I ran a hot bath and soaked for a while. By 5am I was wide awake again. Went back to the couch and scrolled through the channels. TV sucks that early. All the sudden it's 7:15 and Husker is home from work. By 7:30 I snuggled with him in bed and was sound asleep. I guess that's all I needed.
Husker let me sleep peacefully till after 1pm this afternoon. It's been an odd day thus far.
posted by Mary at 4:12 PM
4 Comments:
sorry about your sucky day, I hope tomorrow is better! :o)
Sorry you had such a horrible night!
I have had many of those these past few days!
When you talk about your Dad it makes me think of my Hubby talking about his. He passed away a few months before I met Hubby! He talks of his Dad the same way you talk of yours!
I am sorry your families are not there for you! Mine is no better, except for Nae!
((((HUGS))) I sure hope you start to feel better!!
Sorry you had a bad night and a fight with one of your friends. My stepdad was like the dad I never had even though I have a dad but he passed away only 4 yrs after my mom married him. Boaters fdamily is never really there for him unless they want something. You have an awesome hubby Java and sometimes thats all we need. I hope you are having a better day.
yep, me too - here night and day - although you may have to pick up the phone and not rely on IMing me! LOL . . . I can't believe your family (and especially mom) is like that . . . one day they'll regret it. For now, you do have friends - friends can be better than family sometimes. I'm glad Husker let you sleep in, after a night like that, you needed it!!
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